LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) – Fox is ready to take advice from a 9-year-old.

The studio has acquired the film rights to “How to Talk to Girls,” a cute 46-page self-help tome written by Alec Greven, a Colorado fourth-grader.

Greven wrote “Girls” as a handwritten, $3 pamphlet sold at his school book fair; he wrote it after he noticed his peers were having some trouble talking to the ladies, though the book is geared for all ages. Among this advice: Comb your hair and don’t wear sweats; control your hyperness and cut down on sugar if necessary; a crush is like a love disease that can drive you mad; it is easy to spot pretty girls because they have big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewelry but are like cars that need a lot of oil.

Soon enough Harper Collins picked up the book, which came out in November and quickly became a hit. But initially, Fox, which is like Harper Collins is owned by News Corp ., and its book scouts passed on the title. But when the book hit the town last week, garnering heavy interest from multiple parties, Fox stepped back in and took the book off the table. The deal was in the low-to-mid six figures .

No writers or producers are attached yet.

Reuters/Hollywood Reporter

If someone says, “Is this okay?” You say? Hold My Heart–Tenth Avenue North

How would you describe yourself? Canto Alla Vita–Josh Groban feat. The Corrs

What do you like in a guy/girl? Blessed Assurance–Denver and the Mile High Orchestra

How do you feel today? Backwards–Rascal Flatts

What is your life’s purpose? Flood–Jars of Clay

What is your motto? Get Your Back Off the Wall–Family Force 5 [lol]

What do your friends think of you? Everyday People–Daniel Kirkley

What do you think of your parents? Undying–Demon Hunter

What do you think about very often? Thunder–Boys Like Girls

What is 2 + 2? Caledonia–Celtic Woman

What do you think of your best friend? Worlds Apart–Jars of Clay

What do you think of the person you like? The Fox–Nickel Creek [what? this makes no sense whatsoever! lol]

What is your life story? D-I-E 4 Y-O-U–Family Force 5 [good one!]

What do you want to be when you grow up? Hearts in the Air–Tim Hawkins

What do you think of when you see the person you like? May It Be–Lisa Kelly [hmmm..."May it be an evening star shines down upon you, may it be as darkness falls your heart will be true"...not far off!]

What will you dance to at your wedding? Most Wonderful Time of the Year– Denver and the Mile High Orchestra

What will they play at your funeral? Caroline–Seventh Day Slumber [awww!]

What is your hobby/interest? I Dreamed a Dream–Hayley Westenra [making my hobby...dreaming? possible...]

What is your biggest fear? Over My Head–Brian Littrell

What is your biggest secret? Un Dia Llegara–Josh Groban

What do you think of your friends? Joy to the World–Denver and the Mile High Orchestra

What will you post this as? All’Improvviso Amore–Josh Groban

I’ve gotten so much sleep this weekend, it’s just beautiful. I slept long Friday night, took a nap Saturday afternoon, slept well Saturday night, then took another nap this afternoon.

I think it’s because my back feels much more aligned than usual, so I’m more comfortable.

I’m gonna be so spoiled. I’ve got no idea how I’m gonna keep going Monday without trying to take a nap in the afternoon.

“Two Lights”

Five for Fighting

What is courage
Is it brave
What are lions
I’ve only seen them in parades
How is love supposed to read
In a footnote of history
What’s a tap on your shoulder
That you’re afraid to look over
A soldier’s down in a fire fight
No one can look me in the eye

This is what it means to be alone.

Tear out my heart
Feed it to lions
For this one wish I beg you this tonight
Show me no mercy
But spare me my pride
I’m going for a drive

And if you find out he’s coming home
When I come around the corner
I’ll know that it’s alright
Just leave me two lights

He was young just 23
Didn’t have to go
But it was the man he wanted to be
Like every son he was an only one
One day he came to me, said
Freedoms nothing to look over
Till each man can stand upon its shoulder
I’ll right you mountains of letters
Each one a little bit better
And know I’ll never be alone

Tear out my heart
Feed it to lions
For this one wish I beg you this tonight
Show me no mercy
But spare me my pride
I’m going for a drive

And if you find out he’s coming home
When I come around the corner
I’ll know that it’s alright
Leave me two lights

Silent angels
Light the road up ahead
As the sentries guard the way
On the avenue of borrowed time

I’m almost home
The sun’s to rise
I got to know
I’ve been driving all the night
There’s our corner up ahead
I’m alive and I am dead
I drive right through the stop sign
I turn my head
As I lift my eyes
My eyes burn

Tear out my heart
Feed it to lions
For this one wish I beg you this tonight
Show me no mercy
Spare me my pride

I’m going for a drive

Opening credits: I’ll Be Home For Christmas–Michael Buble

Waking up: Falls Apart–Thousand Foot Krutch

First day at school: Breathe You In–Thousand Foot Krutch (Hey what are the odds? Two in a row!)

Falling in love: All Around Me–Flyleaf (Beautiful!)

Fight song: Hoopes I Did It Again–Relient K

Breaking up: Everything That You Ever Wanted–Hawk Nelson (Awww…)

Prom: Nuisance–John Reuben

Mental breakdown: Orinoco Flow–Celtic Woman

Driving: I’ve Got the World on a String–Michael Buble

Flashback: Sunday!–Tree63

Getting back together: Song for You–Michael Buble feat. Chris Botti (Beautiful!)

Wedding: Father’s Love– Bob Carlisle

Final Battle: The Situation–Krystal Meyers

Death Scene: Let Go–BarlowGirl (Nice!)

Funeral song: Friend Like That–Hawk Nelson

End Credits: 4:12–Switchfoot

And again…

Opening credits: Explosive–bond (Nice opening!)

Waking up: Quando, Quando, Quando–Michael Buble

First day at school: Wonder (If She’ll Get It)–Superchic[k] (lol)

Falling in love: Sunshine–Stellar Kart

Fight song: Dare You to Move–Switchfoot

Breaking up: Danny Boy–Celtic Woman

Prom: Dubhdarra–Lisa Kelly

Mental breakdown: Only Jesus (My Legacy)-Denver and the Mile High Orchestra

Driving: I Don’t Know–Third Day

Flashback: Oceano–Josh Groban

Getting back together: If Everyone Cared–Nickelback

Wedding: Amen–Shaun Groves

Final Battle: Bring Him Home–Daniel Rodriguez

Death Scene: Some Will Seek Forgiveness, Others Escape–Underoath

Funeral song: Rainy Days and Mondays–The Carpenters

End Credits: One More Round–BarlowGirl

HOW THEY PLAY BASKETBALL:

First, assemble two teams. The game I witnessed was men’s basketball; I assume it works the same for the ladies, but we’ll refer back to the men’s game here (and before I get called a sexist, I AM a woman, if that isn’t evident from my other posts. We’re cool.) So you assemble two teams of men. Promote rivalry between these men. How you do this is up to you, most seem to use school spirit or regional pride to accomplish this. Also, the team who owns the court gets to pick one special player. I’m not sure what criteria our school used, but this guy was very durable, pleasant, got good grades, and had good hair, so it must be along those lines. He’ll come into the picture a little later. Place these two teams of men on one “court” (place with a hard wood floor and bleachers), and place a basket way up over their heads on each side.

Now comes the truly evil part: give these guys ONE BALL and expect them to share! What happens in preschool happens in college; human beings have an innate inability to share things. So the two teams will begin to fight over the ball. The crowd in the bleachers will cheer for one team or the other in a manner reminiscent of the gladiator fights of the coliseum (or the Lions vs. Christians events, if the teams are especially mismatched.) The tall guys have a distinct advantage here, as they’ve figured out that what works for the teacher in preschool will work for them now: if they can put the object in question up high enough, the others can’t have it! What they don’t realise? The baskets (where they might put the ball) are defective. They have holes in the bottom of them, and the ball keeps falling out. Every time that happens, the other team tries to take the ball away and hide it in their basket, which, since both baskets are defective, doesn’t work either.

Remember the special guy you picked out before? He comes in now. If, at any time, this guy gets run down by everyone else, a guy in stripey clothes yells that there’s a foul. (Note: the stripey clothes guy seems to be very important, as he has a whistle and can even break up fights. One wonders, then, why he’d stand there and let these guys fight over the ball, but theodicy or anything analogous to it is not the subject of this post.)  Sometimes, they even make a force field next to one basket, and one guy tries to throw the ball into it. The emotional torture for the other team seems to have the name of “free throws”.

Now, every time the guys try to hide the ball in the basket and it fall out, someone has been giving them points (and the pep band’s been playing, but that kinda goes with the crowd cheering.) At the end, someone adds up all the points, and whoever has tried to hide the ball the most times wins. Then everyone gets really excited…and goes home.

And that, my friends, is how they play basketball.

The “time-out” system is flawed.

Shocker! Let me explain.

I work with the two-year-olds, which, in the afternoons, combine with the one-year-olds. So typically there are four or five kids in my room at the end of the day, ranging from just turned one to nearly three. They are all at different levels as far as speech, listening, sharing, etc., though not a one of them is fully potty-trained (they’d move on to the next room if they were).

Yesterday I was working with a little boy, we’ll call him K. But that’s not what I call him in my mind. In my mind, I call him the Cooler King, after Steve McQueen’s character in The Great Escape. You’ll soon see why.

K is probably our most verbal child, and I’m pretty sure the oldest. He’s a sweetheart, but there’s one catch: he’s the LOUDEST CHILD ON GOD’S GREEN EARTH! This kid has the lung capacity to be the next Luciano Pavarotti…or to blow up hot water bottles til they burst.

Yesterday, he and V, another little boy who’s just barely two, both wanted to play with the same truck. It’s a cool truck, too, so I can understand why. K took the truck from V, resulting in V’s indignation.

“K,” I said, “V was playing with the truck. Give it back to him and play with another toy; you can have a turn when he’s done.”

K: “NOOOOO!”

Me: “K, you need to listen to the teacher. You have five seconds, or you’ll have to sit in time-out. 1…”

K:”NOOOOOO!”

Me: “2…”

K: “I DON’T WANT TIME-OUT!”

Me: “3…”

K: “SHUT UP!”

My mind: “Cooler, twenty days.”

My voice: “K, we don’t say ‘shut up’ to our teacher. Come sit in time-out!”

K: “NOOOOOO! I DON’T WANT TIME-OUT! I DON’T WANT IT! I DON’T WANT IT!”

This went on for about 7 minutes: about every fifteen seconds, K would shout either “NOOOOO!” or “I DON’T WANT IT!”. At the seven-minute mark (he would’ve been out much sooner, but he was still shouting), after many admonitions to stop shouting and sit quietly in the time-out chair, K suddenly grew quiet. “Super,” I thought, “He’s calming down!” I turned away for a moment to tie another kiddo’s shoes and felt movement behind me. I turned around again and looked.

It was K. Sneaky child that he is, he decided that time-out would be more tolerable if he had a toy with him. So he snuck over and chose…a playground-sized ball. Way to go, K. I can’t even see that in your hand, nooooo.

(A side note here: These kids stick together. I’ve seen two year olds start “prison ministries”, where they aid and abet timed-out ones to obtain toys, snacks, and two-year-old gibberish counseling. Serious!)

Me: “K, we don’t play with toys in time-out. Give it here. Now sit quietly and you can play in a minute.”

K: “NOOOOOOOO! I DON’T LIKE TIME-OUT! I DON’T WANT IT!….” etc.

Me: “We’ve been over that, kiddo, now sit!”

That was the first of four times over the next 10-12 minutes that I confiscated toys from K, still in time-out (given the fact that he was still shouting at the top of his lungs every fifteen seconds. This kid would’ve been great at the Ephesian riot in the book of Acts!) I was starting to feel a little like Inspector Javert from Les Miserables: “For heaven’s sake, the guy’s in for petty theft…for 19 years, cause he keeps busting out! Gimme a break!”

Finally the shouting stopped, and as I confiscated the fourth toy, K said in a very repentant little voice, “I’m sorry!”

He sat still for about a minute, then I let him out and he came over, hugged me, and started apologising. Awww…

Although this story does bring up one solution to kids voluntarily getting out of time-out: at the program my sister works at, the time-out chair in the two-year-olds’ room is a restaurant-style highchair, complete with safety belt. Genius.